her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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