But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
be right there i have to get my cape
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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