she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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