thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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