He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
