RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
