Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize