It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
