are you so shy because you have an std?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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