yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
