Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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