I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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