Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
