I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
