im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
