dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Is it because I queefed?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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