If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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