if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
