the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
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All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!