Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
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