No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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