idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
