I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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