Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize