At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
