I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
