is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Randomize
