I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize