I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
