I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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