conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Randomize
