During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
