Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Please, let me fuck your mom
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
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