what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
we're making bets on your personal life
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
