I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I believe in your delicious
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize