He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
