I got chris browned last night
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
