dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
