yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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