Ambien. No doubt about it.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
