new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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