Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
His hands were made for my vagina.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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