walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize