You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
No I am not eating basil off your cock
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
How naked do you want me to be?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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