someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
The air was thick with penises
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize
