its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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