Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Randomize