he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
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