Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
