belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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