why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
